rice cakes and coffee

ITEM. My favorite five albums this year are by a semi-feminist dancehall singer, a former member of Menudo, a country singer who was mostly raised by her sister after their father shot their mother in front of them, a rapper from Chicago (but not the rapper from Chicago that everyone else is all salivating over, don't get me wrong, Kanye's okay and all), and a couple from San Francisco by way of Tijuana and Havana.

ITEM. My children can sing five different crunk songs, to one degree or another.

ITEM. I get incredibly happy geeking out about fantasy sports. Until last year, I didn't get it and made fun of people for doing stuff like that. But my hoops team is winning the league thanks to its over-reliance on Trail Blazers, Pistons, and Bucks, and my English Premiership team is in the top 10 along with my brother's team (he knows NOTHING about English football) and my kids' team, which is kicking both our arses. And I have TWO different baseball teams, the draft for the ILX one being tomorrow, it's all I can do not to spend work time tweaking. Oh Lord help a poor sinner.

ITEM. Here is my lineup for one of my baseball teams: C Joe Mauer 1B Derrek Lee 2B Michael Young/Mark Loretta SS Edgar Renteria 3B Miguel Cabrera/Bill Mueller LF Albert Pujols CF Juan Pierre RF Sammy Sosa UTIL Ken Griffey/Scott Podsednik/Geoff Jenkins, starting pitchers are Josh Beckett Sidney Ponson Barry Zito Dontrelle Willis Johan Santana, relief pitchers are Matt Mantei Jorge Julio Brian Donnelly. I know you don't care but still, it's helping me get back into baseball which I want desperately to do, I used to know all this stuff like the back of your girl's head.

ITEM. I am formally apologizing for that last crack. Also I am formally apologizing for your girl.

ITEM. If Fantasia Barrino doesn't win American Idol 3, my whole family will be heartbroken. We're all huge fans, even Sammy who loves her because she's from North Carolina, the state with which he's obsessed. She's better than Ruben and Clay and Kelly and Tamyra too. That's right I said it.

ITEM. Cancel all my previous statements about "Reasons To Stay Alive," the correct answer should have been Funkentelechy Vs. the Placebo Syndrome. Oh yeah and my kids and friends and family and my wonderful internet community et cet. But yeah, Lundberg Family Farms Sesame Tamari rice cakes and coffee and P.Funk pretty much works for me.

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