and he's back. what has he learned.

walking by myself
sometimes you walk with me too:
late December wind

One of the things you learn about yourself is that you are always learning things about yourself. It's also the first thing you forget about yourself. Probably all the better to remember it later. To make it sink in. You have to forget it over and over to make it sink in.

Turn around, discover what's behind you, in front of you, looming in the background. Of course it's you you idiot it was always you. Who else would it be.

I exit the movie theater, my brother's just started his cigarette, I've decided not to stand in line just to piss, I'll just wait until we get home. There is an ocean I want to say to him, maybe he wants to say something to me too. Luckily, all we talk about it is the movie.

The movie was about honor and sacrifice and bravery and inspiration, about how the little guy can make a difference after all, about how evil must be defeated by any means necessary. I know what the evil is and so do you, it's looking over your shoulder, it's the space between, it's the shadowy place where the king has no dominion. It's the basement it's the human heart.

But we don't go there, me and my brother, we talk about the movie. Not even the themes. We talk about special effects, characters, dialogue, story-arc, we compare it to other movies we've seen. I get home, my wife's still up while my brother's pissing, she's still mad at me because I was an asshole before I left, I apologize, she pretends to forgive me, she asks me how it was. I criticize the acting of one of the actors. The space between the space between.

The chef so skillful that his knife never gets dull. He cuts in the invisible space between.

The directions on the Barbasol can, the way it used to be: "To avoid irritation, use gentle strokes with a sharp razor."

The way only the Shadow knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men.

Stop it, Marlowe.

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